It never really matters what I want. If it did, it would not come to this. So I accept the terms. I live through it so that in the end, if faithful enough, I can enjoy my own creation in death. I sound like a true Christian still. The emotions are there. I covet the things I never get. I bathe in things I almost get. It's like a nightmare where you almost reach the door in time to save yourself.

Trust is a misplaced word not meant for this universe. Business. That's the word you're looking for. Business. It's always a business.

So dry your tears and stop behaving like it meant something different. It is what it is, no buddhist could have done it better. (Spread your legs like you mean it)

The end.

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